Tag: hiking

SIGHTS

The Charmin Bears Would Not Be Amused

X. Jupiter Hart

I was originally going to use my shiny new TikTok account as a showcase for my spontaneous poetry, but that concept lasted only for the first couple of videos. The more abstract and avant-garde creations of mine elicit more of a reaction from the Internet-surfing public, from the looks of things. Creations that will presumably become even trippier now that I’ve acquired Premiere as part of a bundle package with Photoshop. Had to do some tinkering around with the graphics card to get Premiere to work properly on Windows 11, but before long I had churned out the maiden GIF. I found myself promptly deactivating that Creative Cloud portal/updater doohickey that Adobe always installs on your machine when you buy one of these programs, though. That thing’s just a RAM whore. Mostly useless to boot.

On a completely unrelated note, this particular location has never had toilet paper. Ever. If you go number two, you must wipe your ass against the trees like the bears do it. But the beach is lovely.

@x_jupiterhart

#summer #hiking #beach #beachvibes #psychedelictok #outdoors #outhouse #canada #fyp

♬ Three Friends – 2011 Remaster – Gentle Giant
SMELLS

Summer’s Last Crumbs: A Duology (Part II)

X. Jupiter Hart

I was not aware that entire buildings were constructed for such a purpose. That’s now a thing that I know.

Two all-beef patties, special sauce, lettuce, cheese…

Regrettably, Jack-in-the-Green mysteriously disappeared the other weekend, somewhere along another nature trail near another lake. This is his replacement, Professor Plum.

I would have called it Deep Purple if it was a slightly different hue.
SMELLS

Summer’s Last Crumbs: A Duology (Part I)

X. Jupiter Hart

Nestled somewhere deep in the woods is a spot where a dude can really get his Zen on. Well worth the (slightly steep) price of a parking permit. The province will soon be shutting down that spot for the winter, so I decided to squeeze in one last visit.

This strain is called Monkey’s Breath. I think. Most of the bowl was already smoked before I even thought to take a picture of it.
That’s one fancy looking outhouse.
I bet there’s at least one jackass every year who’s actually glad to pay that extra $150.

Behind the fancy outhouse is a yellow brick road. Except it’s a more of a drab grey colour, and the bricks are wooden. Didn’t see any lions or tigers, but at one point I thought I heard a bear. Which turned out to be just a very loud squirrel. Oh my!

“…and you’ve just had some kind of mushroom, and your mind is moving low…”

There’s no Emerald City at the end of that yellow brick road. Instead, one finds something arguably even better. Another lake.

That’s probably the Wizard’s house, but I ain’t swimming that far.

That feeling of sand between one’s toes is regrettably nowhere near as blissful as it was but a few weeks ago. I spent very little time at the beach, save a quick polar bear plunge to wash off the sweat accrued from a four-kilometre hike. One I didn’t have to apply two coats of DEET all over every inch of my body for. The mosquitoes (which are the size of small dogs around these parts) have been thankfully reclaimed by the spirits.