The Soundtrack of SILVER BROWN

Food of the Gods

My supervisor asked me last week during lunch break about the last meal I would have if I were on death row. Not that I would actually do anything to warrant being on death row. A hypothetical question obviously, in light of the fact that capital punishment has been prohibited in Canada since 1976.

As for the answer, it was a traditional Scottish haggis supper with neeps and tatties. My supervisor reacted with disgust. I could tell right away she had never tried haggis in her life. It’s a trait shared by everyone I’ve ever met with similar sentiments towards the “great chieftain o the puddin’-race”. They have never tried it.

If meat was booze, haggis would be a carefully aged full-flavoured single-malt scotch, and bacon would be Mike’s Hard Lemonade.

The Zen of SILVER BROWN

They’re Never After Me Lucky Charms

Once upon a time, I travelled to a land far, far away in a mystical chariot with a built-in USB port. A land steeped in centuries-old tradition inhabited by benevolent bear-spirits who walk like men. They helped me slay that faceless snow monster who came after me for eating that Finnish hoagie sandwich. Don’t regret eating that sandwich one bit, though. It was magically delicious.

This is the foyer to the local hospital. How bitchin’ is that?

The Green Grass of SILVER BROWN

A Digital Fossil Exhibit

This is actually not the first blog I’ve ever started. I’ve created about half a dozen of them in my lifetime, but none of my former blogs presently exist. Most of them were shut down voluntarily by me a few months after launching. Usually out of boredom. Or maybe because I just couldn’t be arsed to do the work involved in creating and maintaining a blog. It was one of those reasons. This current blog has already outlasted every blog I’ve done before, so it’s got that going for it at least.

I archive most of what I create, and remnants of former blogs still exist in my personal digital vaults. Here’s a titular wordmark I created for the header of one of my old attempts…

cerbfurzejo3
Rough translation: “The Brainfart Place”. I wrote it another language and used a fancy script font to make it an elegant brainfart place.

…and here’s a banner I created for somebody else’s blog (which also no longer exists)…

katzbanner


There’s also this skull banner I did once, although I can’t for the life of me remember what blog I did this for…

skullbanner


Lastly, I give you this collection of photographic evidence from that time five years ago when I created a (working!) ganja pipe from a jalapeño pepper. One that had just the right shape to be used for such a purpose. All it needed were exactly two incisions…

jalapeno_pipe_before


jalapeno_pipe_after


jalapeno_pipe_in_action
There’s my trusty old laptop Lucille in the background, who has since retired to the great network in the sky. #RIP

Despite being refrigerated at all times when not in use, the jalepeño pipe only lasted for a few days before it started rotting and I had to retire it. But it was an interesting experiment while it lasted. This pipe imparted a zesty Tex-Mex flavour to the smoke. At least it did while it was still fresh. Then decomposition set in and it started tasting more like Taco Bell…

jalapeno_pipe_rotten


jalapeno_pipe_retired