Tag: education

TASTE

The Teacher Gave It a B+

X. Jupiter Hart

I took a class in Abnormal Psychology this last semester. Had to take one elective outside the standard curriculum to advance to the next semester, and Abnormal Psychology was available as an option. So I took it, thinking it would be an interesting course to take. ‘Twas. Bumped into a few old acquaintances on the pages of that textbook. My final assignment was to submit a paper where I wax psychiatric about the biological horror masterpiece that is David Cronenberg’s The Fly. The professor would’ve accepted any memorable villain or antihero from a movie, so I opted to go all Sigmund Freud on the eponymous insect-human hybrid, on the assumption that Hannibal Lecter, Michael Corleone and Darth Vader would be done to death. Best homework assignment ever. Reminiscent of Grade 10 science, except I verbally dissected a Brundlefly. But why in the blazes doesn’t Disney+ have the sequel?

The CN Tower is visible for a few seconds in one scene, but not this scene in particular.
SIGHTS

I Created an Oviform Monster

X. Jupiter Hart

This is part of a science experiment I did for school. I was curious as to what the end product would taste like, so I cooked it up and ate it. In short, it was a culinary abomination. Had to slather the whole thing in generous amounts of salsa just to make it palatable. Smelled like roadkill as it cooked, and gave me a colossally bad gutache that lasted for the next twenty-four hours. The havoc it wreaked on my digestive tract admittedly didn’t ruin the Grey Cup for me as much as A.J. Ouellette’s touchdown in the fourth quarter. But still, it was bad enough to convince me that raspberry purée is a terrible thing to marinate an egg in.

It looked and tasted like a puddle of raspberry juice before I cooked it.

…but for whatever reason, marinating a different egg in blueberry purée (as opposed to raspberry) gave the end product the taste and consistency of yogurt. It was like eating a dairy product that never involved a cow. There were no subsequent violent rumblings in my intestines to boot.

I still think I’m gonna use HP Sauce if I ever try this experiment again.
FEELS

Your Grandkids’ Teachers Will Probably Be Droids

X. Jupiter Hart

Droids that no one will have the hots for. Except maybe a few fetishistic machinosexual types. There is little doubt in my mind such people exist. I’ve seen some pretty weird shit.

I formerly worked in the Internet business in addition to spending the last two years doing everything under the sun online because of that microscopic Ghatanothoa. Coding React modules was my stress-baking. One would think attending a lecture in a classroom where the instructor is two hours away in another city shouldn’t feel weird. Yet it does. Just a tad. For some reason. 

Not quite as weird as this, but still…